There is a lot going on in the world right now. The ongoing global pandemic being one major crisis still affecting us all. I have been reading widely around decision-making in the time of COVID-19, with a particular interest in how society can thrive post-pandemic. How will people change and grow, rebound and succeed in the wake of a pandemic?
Personally, my family is facing a time of major life decisions. We currently live abroad and had originally planned to do so for a few more years yet, however this may come to an abrupt end. This is partly due to personal circumstances, partly due to the pandemic and possibly partly due to me being older and wiser with regards to my ability to make decisions. And this is what got me thinking…has living through a pandemic made me think and behave differently or am I simply getting better and more confident in my decision making as I age? Decision making has never been a strength of mine by the way, quite the opposite, and apparently typical for a Libran, should you believe in that kind of stuff!
In October I took the brave decision to resign from my job as a deputy headteacher, without having another position lined up. Never in my life have I taken such a risk, and yet never in my life have I ever felt so sure about a decision being the right one. I have totally surprised myself with my own actions and have been trying to unpick them ever since, leading me to write this post.
According to one of the many articles I have read, we rarely make decisions in a vacuum – even if they seem entirely personal. And we are influenced by those around us more than we might think. This certainly rings true to me. My sons, since they were born, have been without doubt the most important people for me to consider when making decisions. As they are now both planning to return to the UK for the next phases of their lives, I know that I want to be closer to them. Not just to make me feel happier, in perhaps a selfish and maternal way, but really for them to be sure, if they aren’t already, that they are the priority.
It has taken me until 44 years of age to fully appreciate how lucky I have been in life and to realise that I was the priority for my own parents since the day they knew they were having me! I was not planned, I was totally unexpected, and my parents were prepared to turn their whole lives around to make mine the best it could possibly be, and that is a gift that very easily goes unnoticed.
Knowing you are a priority in someone’s life and indeed knowing what our own priorities in life are allows us to experience meaning in life. Throughout history and across cultures, social scientists, philosophers, religious scholars, poets and lay people alike have grappled with the all-important issue of meaning. Indeed, the search for the meaning of life is the primary motivation in human beings – from young children asking “why” questions to make sense of the world, to adults, like me, seeking more meaning at work.
For me personally, I know that the primary focus of my decision was my family, but it was made in the context of Covid-19, my professional development, the experiences of my friends and the things that happen around us every day; the things that shape you more and more as you grow older.
Whether due to the pandemic or to me getting older, I have realised that when we take responsibility for our choices and actions in day-to-day life, we can spend more time on the things that really matter to us. I have also realised that there is never a “right time”. As the sayings go, “there is a never a good time to make a hard decision” and “there is no time like the present”. So, the best time to do anything is now. Take that first step toward your goal. Waiting will only make you older, not wiser.